Saturday, June 21, 2008

Lil' Wayne Million: Top Ten Verses

Ya diiiiiig??? You've most likely already read or heard about it. In the first week of sales Lil' Wayne aka Weezy F. Baby aka Young Carter aka the Birdman J.R. aka The Rapper Eater aka Mr. Every-time-you-see-me-got-a-new-chain broke one-million in sales, something that hasn't been accomplished in three years when some guy released an album called The Massacre. But the event is not as important as how he accomplished it.

First, let it be said that Wayne is one of the best rappers alive if not the best (see top ten lines below). That is to say that the process could be imitated to a T and without the talent and nuance, the end result would not come close to the topic at hand. So, what is it about Wayne's actions that separates him from every other rapper out today? There are three major defining characteristics:

1. He constantly smokes marijuana, often sites his personal affinity for 'pills' and ingests what rappers most often refer to as Drank, purple stuff, Sizzurp or Lean. More specifically, he has mentioned on multiple occasions that he ingests the third on a daily basis. If one were to research the history and make up of the southern-born beverage, they would find that Wayne is the most common selection for the position of spokesperson. Could this cause his brain to malfunction in the same vain as a circuit bent children's toy? Or the prophetic madness of Plato's Phaedrus? Or perhaps he is like the superhero with the perpetual superpower-gifting laboratory disaster? What it almost certainly does is allow him the credibility and respect (that is of paramount importance in the rap game) attained by other rock or rap legends through their respective self-destruction, for example, Lou Reed, Keith Richards, DJ Screw and others.

*Obligatory relevant Wayne:
'I'm on that lala, twist it up, I'm on that syrrup slow it down.' - 'I Know the Future'

2. He maintains his popularity and visibility by guest staring on other artists' tracks. Not only that, but as he is asked to do so he maintains a perceived demand, as the idols of many show their fans that they view Wayne as a constant asset. This money-by-association is most notable through Wayne's close relationship with Jay -Z that was fully exposed on the Carter III itself when Jay anointed Wayne with the line 'I took too much change from this rap game, it's your go.' Not to mention that the money he receives for said guest spots allows him to stay financially on top and ready to purchase backing tracks of at least mid-level demand.

*Obligatory relevant Wayne:
'Never Give Free Bees 75 Thousand For These Beats' - 'Upgrade U'

3. Hard work and relentless supply to those who ask for everything. Some artists in the industry are trying demand more from their fans. Pioneered by Lars Ulrich of Metallica and his crusade against P2P revolutionary Shawn Fanning years ago, these self-destroyers on the opposite side can't seem to understand that the industry will move forward and if they don't move with it, they'll be rolled over. Wayne's free content and otherwise all out embrace of what most consider to be pitfalls of the modern music industry through hard work has amassed him a following large enough that even a small percentage of buyers adds up to numbers that few thought would ever be possible again. This is the direction of the music industry. Fans want, Wayne gives. If you deserve recognition as an artist then the music your fans (can now more easily) hear for free is only more publicity , more tickets sold and more revenue to the many other avenues through which an artist and his or her label can make money.

*Obligatory relevant Wayne:
'Can you picture Carter V?' - 'A Milli Freemix'
'Shout out to every DJ bootleggin, 'cause I made history a-ny-way.' - 'A Milli Freemix'
'...gettin back to work - Carter IV' - Youtube thank you to all fans, paying and not

And now here is a personal 'Top Ten Best Wayne Lines' (A list could never be truly completed or universally accurate). It should be mentioned that I do not endorse or promote any of the ideas or actions within these lines, only the skill with which they are conveyed:

1. 'Safe sex is great sex. Better use a latex, 'cause you don't want that late text, that 'I think I'm late' text.'
2. 'Dear Mr. Toilet, I'm the shit - got these other haters pissed 'cause my toilet paper thick.'
3. '...trying to tell you I can kick it like Lu-Kang ni**a, got that Sub-Zero flow, how you on me ma. Ni**a get over here like Scorpion.'
4. 'Sitting in the coop looking like a racer, top peeled back like the skin of a potato, seat way back listen to Anita Baker riding by myself smoking weed by the acre'
5. 'Start with straight shots and then pop bottles, pour it on the models, shut up bitch swallow, if ya cain't swallow, shut up bitch gargle, I'm fresh up out the water with my Mark Jacobs goggles!'
6. 'We are not the same, I am a martian. It's Young Weezy F. Baby, no abortion. I have Hoes. I do not have to force them. This just do what I say Jack like wheel of fortune.'
7. 'I get head in the strangest places; two at the same time i call it changin faces. I tell the bitch we aint tradin places, now stand back n catch my amazin graces.'
8. 'I am a robot and this robot is on overload'
9. '...and I'm so muthafuckin high I could eat a star'
10. 'I'm the man in this bitch, they say money talks well I'm the ventriloquist'

Honorable mention in no particular order:

The entire verse from 'Make it work for ya.'
'It's young Weezy F. Baby - no abortion'
'If that line under a gram then that line ain't mine'
'I got a great idea, we should have sex. Bitch im like Daunte Hall, I just throw up the X.'
'They cannot see me, they are like Stevie, I am Barring-a-ton like Levy.'
'Yeah bitch that's my girl, and she pops x-cellent up in Wayne's World'
'I tip the bitch and she ain't comin back to work for a month.'

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